A fun story with Emoticons: Steve’s World

Once there was a man named Steve (⌐ ͡■ ͜ʖ ͡■) and Steve didn’t know what to do with himself           ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ He knew he needed [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅5̲̅0)̲̅$̲̅] to live, yet he could even barely build an Ikea shelf.         ლ(ಥ Д ಥ )ლ But one fine day as he was walking by the Gym ᕕ( ⁰ ▽ ⁰ )ᕗ he heard a pleasant melody that awakened something within him ♪♬༼ ⨀ ̿Ĺ̯̿̿⨀ ̿༽ He followed the alluring sound until he reached double doors, and there he stayed ┬┴┬┴┤(･_├┬┴┬┴ for with his lack of skill, he was afraid they’d call him terrible names (⊹◕ʖ̯◕) But before Steve knew what was happening, the music took hold and to the beat, his foot began tapping. At first he moved stiffly, his gyrations lacked confidence ┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘But soon he learned well, and he was beginning to dance! ~(˘▾˘~) (~˘▾˘)~ Before he knew it, Steve was moving like a pro, ┌(▀Ĺ̯ ▀-͠ )┐ grooving and jiving like he was born for it from the get-go. ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ  Steve finally felt proud, his faith had been renewed. And that’s when Steve had a brilliant idea, he would start up his very own dance crew! ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°) They practiced and practiced, and soon they were put to the test, against the best the city had to offer, and Steve told them “No less”. For Steve was not scared, he was ready for anything (ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง and he went bravely into the competition where the crowd’s cheers were deafening! His team danced like they deserved the win, and the judges agreed ༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽ *Ten points!* But the opposing team got angry, filled with hate and greed (っ-̶●̃益●̶̃)っ୧( ಠ Д ಠ )୨ ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)        ┌( ◕ 益 ◕ )ᓄ But the judges weren’t having it, they sent them on their way. Though not before those greedy baztards flipped the judges table out of the way (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻ But Steve was not perturbed, if anything he was triumphant \ (•◡•) / And from that day on, Steve had it planned. He would forever be a dancer, and as a dancer, he would be grand ᕕ(⌐■_■)ᕗ ♪♬

Emoticons courtesy of dongerlist.com and their MANY emoticon options

This is in no way meant to be grammatically correct. This is just me having fun with text.