Spoiler alert: the book series “Youth in Revolt” is mentioned in the afterword and contains key spoilers, so avoid the bottom of the page if you haven’t read the book yet!
Driving down an open road, the usual route
The sun-roof open, the sun still out
a woman’s smoky voice swims through
Airwaves as she sways and croons
Of love, far gone, still warm and true
I’ll park my car, in a familiar shadow
Under the willow, letting down
Autumn’s gold and amber hair
In piles I’d joyously dance around, but for
Who I see in this small cafe, I’m ill-prepared
I stop, I stutter, breathing shallow, rapid
Only moments left to run, before
My curious eyes are left raptured
By her angelic gaze, in a perfumed haze
Her captivating voice; oh! How I’m still amazed
The fading nail polish, the sandy hair,
Eyes of the purest sapphire,
That genuine smile so rare!
She returned from a journey afar
From exotic lands and sights to share.
She traveled with another, more divine than I
For she saw in him, a true believer; devout
Pure, free of sin, worthy of His watchful eye
And I, simply an underling, in endless drought
Struggled to dim the light I couldn’t live without
And now, face to face, I stand terrified,
Blinded by luminescent resurgence
Emotions I thought to be long efaced, resurface
My mouth moves, though little sound escapes
What brought me here? Why this cafe? Why today?!
I thought I’d never see her again, I guess
I hoped I’d never see her again.
Because I know that my offering is no match
For the love she has, and her pious ways.
She is meant for heaven. And I; Purgatory’s maze.
Afterword: I know this poem has had several alternate versions recently, but for me, when a poem of mine has intense personal meaning (Which is usually something I’ve experienced rather than dreamt or imagined), I often come back to it and add bits and pieces to give the story more context for the reader and for my future self. For example; when writing the more personable lines, my mind turns to chaos, and the details in my mind’s eye don’t always make it down on paper the first time around –or possibly even the second or third time– because my mind is not a quick one and easily affected. These small, sometimes grand details slip through the cracks and are only found once again as the dust settles. It’s safe to say I lose a lot of good material, but I love what I do 🙂 Also, the title is in French because I associate cafe’s and dumb love most often with the book “Youth In Revolt”. And how can I forget the way Nick lost everything in France, as Sheeni soon found herself shacking up with a noble Frenchman in a foreign and exotic land, while Nick had to find a way to purge her psychological presence. He never does… but he lives, and lives well
PS: I’m terribly sorry for the spoilers book!